Friday, October 31, 2008


I hate my job. Seriously. This is lame. I want to go to school full time. I don't even care about the loans. I think I should just deal with it.

I hate coming to work. I hate the shit I have to do. I hate that I hate my job.

I want a job that I like that makes lots of money and that doesn't take a lot of schooling.

I applied for some wine jobs yesterday. Hopefully something comes of that.


And I miss Ketzy. I always feel so bad about the fact that I couldn't save her. I hope she wasn't scared, although I am sure that she was. It so sucks to go outside and know that she is buried out there. I know she loved it here but it still makes me sad.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008


The wedding is planned! We are 116 days away.

This is awesome! I am so excited that we decided to move the wedding up 10 months. I am over wedding planning, so this is uber exciting.

The best news is we get to go on a fabulous vacation with all our family and friends to Mexico and go on a sail boat.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Lovely Kitty Ketzy

This is Ketziah, Ketzy for short. She adopted us, well she tried to adopt the first family I nannied for. She kept showing up at their door step to eat. Of course I would feed her. They didn't want to keep her and they said they were going to take her to the pound. I couldn't have that, especially since we had the same color hair. So I took her home and we placed signs around the neighborhood we found her in.
Well time went by and I got more and more attached to her. After a couple days, Timm said we couldn't keep her and she would have to go to the pound. I really, really didn't want this to happen. And I cried and cried and begged him not to take her. And he didn't.
We asked the landlady if we could keep her a viola! she was ours. A couple weeks later the old owner called and said that if we didn't want her we could just let her go, she would find our way home. We asked if we could keep her and she said we could. But by this time I would have had a really hard time letting her go. We had her at least two months by this time. She was only 7 months old when we got her.
She was the cutest cat. She had pink paw pads and freckles on her nose and lips. She didn't like to eat food that had been sitting in her bowl all day long, she always wanted fresh food. She had the loudest purr and whenever someone was sitting on the couch, she took advantage of the available lap. She sat and purred perfectly content she didn't even have to be pet, she just wanted to be near us, especially me. I think she knew that I wanted her and Timm really didn't.
She loved to be outside. She was a savage hunter, I was always taking humming birds away from her.
On October 22, we noticed that she hadn't come home since the night before. This is not like her, she is my little fatty. Whenever someone came home she would come inside to eat and then go outside to play again. I got really worried. I stayed home to look for her. I found her, between the neighbor's house and the fence. She wasn't moving. I was hoping it wasn't her. But it was. She was dead. She had no marks on her other than a little blood on her nose. The neighbor lady heard me crying and come over to help me. She said that, "We have had trouble in this neighborhood of people poisoning cats. I had my cat poisoned and Barry has had two of his cats poisoned. Take her to get tested for poisoning and call animal control."
So I get pissed and take her to the vet to get tested. I almost didn't get her tested because I didn't want to pay for it. I am glad I did because it turns out she was attacked by a raccoon. All her injuries were internal besides some scratches on her nose. The vet actaully said it was so severe they thought she got hit by a car.
I am glad to know that she wasn't poisoned and I don't have to move like tomorrow. But it sucks that she was killed by a raccoon. I knew I hated raccoons.
Ketzy was only 4 1/2. She died outside, doing what she loved, hunting in the backyard.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Working Out

I can't stay motivated. I am hoping that by writing a list of reasons that working out is great I will be more motivated to actually do it. I seem to lose less weight when I am working out so that is not motivation for me to do it.

-I feel like I look better even though it doesn't show in the scale.
-There are many health benefits to working out.
-Sweating feels good, I am getting rid of all the toxins and bad juju from the day.
-I am less hungry.
-I feel pretty good after I do it.
-My arms are actually gaining muscle.
-I can run faster than I used to be able to, especially now that I am running on a treadmill. I can track my progress.
-I can do more situps and leg lifts and I can go lower to the ground.
-Even though it is uncomfortable, I like being sore. I like to know that working out worked!

Thats all for now.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Wedding Related

I am getting excited about the wedding again! I have gone through months of hating it, planning it, paying for it, and guestlist. Ugh it sucks. But plans have changed....yes, again.

Instead of inviting everyone to a wedding in Mexico we are cutting it down to 18 (from 75) including us and the photographers. We are getting married on Las Caletas. In the marina in Puerto Vallarta we are catching a sailboat which will sail for 2 hours and offer appetizers and an open bar for all guests. Then we get to the island and get married, have dinner, dance, and drink and get back on the boat with more open bar and head back to Puerto Vallarta to go out on the town.

We are headed out to Puerto Vallarta for 4 days to finalize everything....we are meeting with the coordinator, putting down a deposit, and going hotel hunting. We want to find a hotel that is cheap but nice and cute. We want it to be on Old Town which is much more quaint and cute and like "real" Mexico that being in the marina or the Malecon District.

We are going to have a party for the rest of the guest list when we get back, over the summer.

Oh and we plan on moving the wedding up to February! I am so excited for all the planning and everything to be over and just be married!

Another bonus?! I get to wear my dress three times, once at the wedding, once at the trash the dress session, and once at the party at home. So excited!

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Coolest Job Ever....

I think I found it!

I was searching, which is an awesome site for jobs in the wine industry which I so desperatly want to break into. It is so competitive though, it will be quite the challenge to break in. Anyway, I found a job for Events Coordinator in a winery in Calistoga and one in Napa. I am so excited, it doesn't even require a degree. I still want to get a degree so I searched public relations degrees and Sonoma State popped up with a Business Administration degree with a wine focus! Oh. My. God. It is fate.

I am applying to Sonoma State today when I get home and to the jobs that are offered. I can't even explain how excited I am. I know there is a huge chance I won't get the job but the fact that it is out there and there is no degree required and there is a degree in Sonoma County that offers a degree that will help me is so exciting.

For the first time, I think ever in my life, I am excited about a career opportunity. It is unreal. It makes me think that I finally found the perfect direction to go in. I can't wait. I am going to try to get Dar to take the classes with me. I know she would want to! So excited! eeekkkk!

I have been having a really hard time lately dealing with the fact that many of my friends are starting their careers and the fact that I am getting married and I don't even have a career. It bothers me and takes quite the toll on my self esteem. I have all these ideas of jobs that I think would be interesting (child psychologist, doctor, surgeon, hygienist, teacher, etc) but it will take so long to do it and I don't want to make another school/career mistake so I have been tentative to stick with an idea for too long. So this at least gives me the hope that I will be headed in the right direction!

Besides I love wine so even if I don't go that way with my career (even though I want to really, really bad) I will learn a lot about wine. YAY!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Over it!

I am ready to elope. Timm's family won't come to Mexico. The only people that are coming are his parents...if we pay for them. It seems that everyday someone else from his family can't come. I don't know what to do. I really want to get married in Mexico but only having my family there when we are supposed to joining our lives just doesn't seem fair.

I don't know what to do. It is so frustrating.

I also don't want to spend the money on a wedding either, local or destination. I hate this. I honestly never thought that I would hate planning my wedding. This seriously sucks. Spending all the money, deciding where to go, trying to make everyone happy including ourselves...everything. This sucks.